Tourist Trap

Location:Zum neuen Blumenstock
Website:No web site
Address:Ballgasse 6, 1010 Wien
Status:Seems to be closed and replaced with a Chinese restaurant (last checked on 30 March 2019)
Eaten:“Heurigerplatte”, light beer (Hirter), dark beer (Hirter Morchl), ¼ of house wine, ¼ of Riesling

To be more tourist than the Blumenstock, you have to be called Gigerl (which is incidentally just 3 meters away). What you should expect is a badly spelled English menu, a slimy waiter who speaks no language and all the languages at the same time (his mother tongue must be Hungarian), plenty of tourists desperate to find out how to drive to Bratislava, and a final bill than misspells the word “Riesling”.

The “cold plate” you get is a mixed bag: better than expected, but just slightly so. It’s very spread-heavy: the two spreads – the to-be-expected Liptauer and some spicy-garlicky-grassy one are average, but are plentiful, allowing for generous spreading over the included five slices of bread. The meats, on the other hand, are almost nonexistent and very industrial, including two salty sausages straight out of a Handl Tyrol plastic. One (!) slice of supermarket’y ham, some cartilage-full Speck and three slices of a cheese-filled sausage (with the cheese falling out) are, honestly, a joke. The additional cheese is tasteless (what else could it be), leaving the Pfefferoni and the round pepper the highlights of the dish.

If you are a tourist, taking the Heurigerplatte at Blumenstock may be a good alternative to all the other stuff they serve, but one has to keep in mind that what you get is neither traditional nor good. Oh, and avoid the beer and the house wine – both are truly terrible.

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