A No-Love Goose

Location:Liebstöckl + Co
Address:Sandgasse 12, 1190 Wien
Status:Closed (last checked on 24 March 2018)
Eaten:Martinigansl, red wine

It comes to no surprise that the consumption of seven geese in less than a month has certain effects on one’s body, which go far beyond obvious gastrological consequences. One can almost expect drastic physiological changes, such as a growth of wings and a suddenly acquired ability to lay eggs. However, there is another, frequently overlooked effect, which displays itself in the inability to describe one’s goose-eating experiences in any kind of creative literary form. The inspiration is gone; fancy words are long forgotten. What is left is a set of hard facts, which interested readers can find listed below in no particular order:

  1. Liebstöckl is a non-wine establishment in the heart of a wine district.
  2. The red wine there is actually quite good.
  3. It calls itself a “noble Beisl”, and it seems to be well-known and popular, too.
  4. The above-mentioned popularity was not at all evident on the day of my visit. In fact, the place was empty.
  5. Correction: there were two (maybe three) drunks at a bar behind the wall, talking loudly and totally incomprehensibly. They might have been representatives of the noble clientèle having deep philosophical discussions. They might have also been completely pissed babbling idiots.
  6. The menu was hand-written, and the prices were presented as words and not numbers, making the menu a really confusing read.
  7. The goose was ordered in advance, so reading the menu was not necessary.
  8. Upon a special request, the dumplings were replaced by mixed vegetables. Seven geese are consumable; seven dumplings are definitely not.
  9. The mixed vegetables contained Maroni (sweet chestnuts), which from my point of view are not vegetables at all.
  10. The red cabbage was worse than the one sold in supermarkets.
  11. The red wine was nevertheless quite good.
  12. The goose was cooked well but without love.
  13. It was not very big, so two minutes after starting I was searching for edible bits like some archeologist would dig for hidden treasure.
  14. The plate also contained a piece of goose liver, which was very cold.
  15. I don’t like liver.
  16. The waiter brought the bill at a quarter past ten, despite the official closing time being the midnight.
  17. Did I mention the red wine? I did? That’s it then.

Side dishes


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