A free advice to those who plan to open an authentic Tyrolean hut in Vienna: Do it somewhere at the outskirts, preferably on a hill. While having it in the first district close to the Ring may sound like a good idea business-wise, sitting even on the most authentic wooden bench just does not have the right atmosphere when cars pass in a meter or so from you.
This Brettljause comes on an impressive piece of wood, normally reserved for spare ribs. The food is carefully spread over it, creating a false impression of quantity. What you get are in fact six or seven thin slices of each of the following: Speck, some reddish ham, Schweinsbraten and cheese with holes (not tasteless, but not special either). In addition, there is some Grammelschmalz, horseradish of average fierceness, slightly watery mustard and a pile of Pfefferoni. Personally I’ve never seen Pfefferoni growing in the Tyrolean mountains, but maybe I just wasn’t looking thoroughly enough. There is also a tiny glass of home-brewed Schnapps of a suspicious red color and an even more suspicious taste of medicine. None of the food is especially bad, but it’s a bit disturbing that all of it is warm. I don’t think that authentic Tyrolean huts have big refrigerators, but Schmalz is generally much more bearable when it’s below the room temperature.
Truth to be told, the salad and the beer were the most enjoyable parts of the meal.
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