The Valley of Nothing

Location:Winzerhaus Hans Schöller
Website:https://www.weinschoeller.at/
Address:Wagramer Strasse 10, 3133 Traismauer
Status:Open (last checked on 21 August 2021)
Eaten:“Winzerhausteller,” ¼ Grüner Veltliner “Rosengarten” 2020, ¼ Grüner Veltliner “Sonnleithen” 2020, ¼ Riesling “Sonnleithen” 2020

#3 Brettljause in 2021Bad news first. Trausental, the Traisen Valley, named after the river that starts in Vienna’s Voralpen (pre-Alps) and joins the Danube not far from Krems, is highly overrated. It’s still quite OK until it reaches Sankt Pölten because of the nice surrounding hills, but then it quickly turns into a flat featureless boredom. For some reason, it is this northern part of the valley that is being heavily promoted as a cycling trail. The only advantage I see is that being on a bike, you will pass through all the dullness of this area quicker. Hiking here, though completely possible, is hardly more exciting than hiking in your own apartment, and if your apartment is big enough, probably much less. 

Yet, Trausental is the home to some of Austria’s best white wines. Hiking to the Schöller, I was expecting it to be nearly empty. In reality, I could barely find a time-limited place at a table in the garden. The Schöller is in a high demand, and it is easy to see why. 

The wines are excellent. I tried three of the best rated ones, and they deserve their high ratings fully. The Brettljause, called the Winzerhausteller, impressed me, too, despite containing both of my least appreciated ingredients, which are the head cheese and the black pudding. 

They were both good, by the way, to the extent they could ever be good in my twisted biased mind. The rest was outstanding, however. The spicy spread of minced meat mixed with vegetables was my absolute favorite, though the second creamy spread was quite nice, too. All the meats – the Speck, the Geselchtes, the Schweinsbraten, and some dry type of ham – tasted very natural and unquestionably came from the nearby farms. 

The Teller was quite cheap, too, just under six euros not counting the bread. This bread-exclusive way of charging did annoy me a bit, for without at least two bread slices the Jause was nearly useless, but still, the value for money was there. 

If I were responsible for the marketing of Traisental, I would have come up with an honest slogan like “I know we are a bit shit, but please try our wines.” Judging by how many Heurige are presently open, most people are already aware of the area’s strengths. Next time, I might actually consider taking a bicycle with me, just to concentrate on the good bits. 

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